It’s been a while. I can’t remember the last time I did this or how to do it. When I originally took a break from the Dan Rhodes Foundation it was only going to be for a couple of weeks. Life had got on top of me as there were a lot of things going on and I just didn’t have the time or headspace to do everything. It was one of those occasions where something had to give, so I made the difficult decision to take a step away from the charity. That decision came with a lot of guilt as I had made a promise to Dan that I would do everything I could, but I had to have a break for the good of my mental health. I was already past breaking point and I’m not entirely sure how I had got that far but looking back I’m glad I did something for my own wellbeing as that hasn’t always been the case in the past.

Much more time has passed than I intended but life doesn’t always go to plan, but this feels like a good time to give this another go. There have been times since I started the Foundation that I’ve wondered whether I should carry on and the last couple of years have been particularly hard as I’ve not been able to do any events to fundraise due to injury and life taking over. When I decided to set up the Foundation in Dan’s memory the aim was simple which was to try and stop the same thing happening to anyone else as if we could help one person that would have made a difference. That still stands today and from feedback we have had, we have achieved that aim. Hopefully everything we have done in fundraising, trying to raise awareness and letting people know that they are not alone has made Dan proud. It’s not been easy trying to keep everything going, trying to reach new people on social media has become increasingly difficult as has fundraising as everyone is tightening their belts and there are so many good causes out there it is difficult to make an impact, but we need to keep going.

It’s not easy putting yourself out there and saying that you are struggling as it is easy to put on a front and say that everything is ok. Despite everything I’ve read and written about depression, I still find it hard to talk about how I am feeling and admitting that I’m struggling and I’m sure that a lot of other people feel the same. There are lots of things that I should do to improve my mental wellbeing but it’s never as easy to do as it is to say. My mental health is an ongoing battle and like any battle there are wins and losses along the way. I’ve been drawing a lot recently which is one of the things that helps me escape as I find that it helps me focus on one thing and stops my mind from wandering into areas that are unhelpful.

One of the changes that I need to make going forward to add to that is getting back into regular exercise as that always improves how I feel both mentally and physically. It’s too easy sometimes to take a step back and not do things as they are hard or challenging but now is the time to get back to it. Things have settled back into a routine after a difficult year, so I need to start pushing myself again.

Managing your mental health will be different for everyone just like the triggers are different. The first step is often to try and find someone to talk to. It could be a friend, your GP or it could be one of the great organisations that are out there to help like the Samaritans, Andy’s Man Club, CALM or Mind. Talking can often be the first step to recovery and there should be no shame in admitting that you need help or about how you feel. Talking doesn’t always work first time, my first course of counselling was really difficult, but keep trying to find the right outlet for you. There are also other things that could help like mindfulness, meditation or yoga and there are lots of great apps and online courses that you might find useful. The key is to try and find what works for you and then make that part of your daily routine.

If you think one of your friends is struggling, one of the best things that you can do for them is to be there when they need you. Checking in with them to see how they are is a good starting point as it shows that someone cares which can make a massive difference to how they are feeling. You could also take some time to find out more about mental health and understand it better which can make it easier to empathise when they do open up. If you can be supportive and help them out if they need anything that can go a long way as depression can be tiring and debilitating. If you can, try and avoid forcing them to talk to you about how they feel. Things will be much easier when they’re ready as trying to force them might make them clam up even more. Just try to let them know that you’re there when they need you.

We all need to try and break the stigma around mental health and make it more normal to ask for help or say how we are feeling. If you find any of our posts or blogs helpful, please share them with your friends as the more people we can reach, the better. If you want to fundraise or help with the running of the Foundation, get in touch as we are always looking for volunteers.

Take care of yourself and those around you and let’s try and make the world a better place for everyone.

Onwards and upwards